Goodbye, my love
I woke up quite early this morning to finish packing up for my other stuffs. My darling is still sleeping and I didn’t have the heart to wake him up yet.
We later drove to the airport.
We didn’t talk much during the journey; we just held our hands tightly as he was concentrating driving. I kept telling myself to be strong and never to let him see me cry. I wanted to portray a strong image for him so that he would not be sad to see me leave.
We finally arrived at the airport and the time is ticking, I’ve got another 45 minutes left with him. We walk around the airport and arrived at the departure gate, I felt a lump in my throat. We both sat there speechless - lost for words – both our faces went blank.
When the reality started to sink in, a massive wave of emotions swept through my mind. I kept reminding myself to be strong, but finally I gave up. I broke down. I was shivering, scared and panic. I started crying uncontrollably, as I told him to take good care of himself. He told me the same thing too, that he will always love me and that he’s gonna miss me.
It’s finally time for me to check in. As we both hug each other, he started crying and so did I. For the first time, we both hugged so tightly, with tears flowing from our eyes as if the world had just stop moving just for the both of us, we totally ignored the peoples around us. It was the first time I ever saw him cry in our relationship. This proves that my darling is really sad.
I had only one wish at that very moment. I wish the world would stop; the time would freeze so that we wouldn’t have to be apart.
I was still crying as I went through the departure gate, my heart has never felt heavier, and my limbs have never felt so stiff. I felt so dizzy as so many things are running through my mind. I was too traumatized.
We later drove to the airport.
We didn’t talk much during the journey; we just held our hands tightly as he was concentrating driving. I kept telling myself to be strong and never to let him see me cry. I wanted to portray a strong image for him so that he would not be sad to see me leave.
We finally arrived at the airport and the time is ticking, I’ve got another 45 minutes left with him. We walk around the airport and arrived at the departure gate, I felt a lump in my throat. We both sat there speechless - lost for words – both our faces went blank.
When the reality started to sink in, a massive wave of emotions swept through my mind. I kept reminding myself to be strong, but finally I gave up. I broke down. I was shivering, scared and panic. I started crying uncontrollably, as I told him to take good care of himself. He told me the same thing too, that he will always love me and that he’s gonna miss me.
It’s finally time for me to check in. As we both hug each other, he started crying and so did I. For the first time, we both hugged so tightly, with tears flowing from our eyes as if the world had just stop moving just for the both of us, we totally ignored the peoples around us. It was the first time I ever saw him cry in our relationship. This proves that my darling is really sad.
I had only one wish at that very moment. I wish the world would stop; the time would freeze so that we wouldn’t have to be apart.
I was still crying as I went through the departure gate, my heart has never felt heavier, and my limbs have never felt so stiff. I felt so dizzy as so many things are running through my mind. I was too traumatized.
I looked back and there he is, still standing there to bid the last farewell. I could see his tears and that really hurt me allot. Sometime, I just wish that I had the guts to follow my heart. To do things I am happy doing, to live my live the way I wanted it to be. I wanted so muc to turn back and walk away from the departure gate, quit my job just to be with him.
But hold on, think again. I can’t do that, my future depended allot on what I do now. Sigghhhh…..
As I was waiting in the departure room, I was still crying and my emotion was so shaken. I had to leave soon! There’s no why for me to turn back. I was full of regrets at that very moment. Looking out the window, parked the Boeing 737 that’s gonna fly me to Borneo. I can’t help but wished that that there’s a bomb planted somewhere in it and then the plane would burst into a giant inferno.
"Dear lord… I don’t want to leave, really!!!"
posted by Borneo King at 11/17/2005 05:08:00 PM
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